Thursday, January 25, 2007

Cash Flow Problem

Last night I was waiting to buy milk while the gentleman in front of me repeatedly swiped his debit card in a vain attempt to pay for his box of Cheerios. After finally realizing he was swiping it upside down and he had to hit the ATM button on the panel, I paid in cash, went home and started getting ready to watch all the 'American Idol' rejects embarrass themselves. During this program I was delighted by an ad for the Visa Check card. You know the one that has that complete idiot that pays with cash while everyone else uses the Visa Check card and he winds up mucking up the entire system and gets dirty looks from the cashier and all the other customers. “Cash!! Why we never!! Barbarian!!” I’ve seen it about 1032 times by now and I get more annoyed by it every time.

Do these dolts at Visa actually think handing cash – you know…actual money – over is more complicated and time consuming than having every idiot and their brother trying to swipe their cards through, remember and enter in their PINS correctly, then make the life altering decision of whether they want cash back or not? Of course not. But if they didn’t make you believe that, how would they then milk you out of your cash by charging you 50 cents per transaction or upping your interest rate to 22% after your first month of service is complete. Their CEO needs his new ski lodge by the end of the year, you know. And you can’t use the Visa Check card for a purchase that big. Can you?

Today’s distraction: Try to identify the corporate logos. It’s fun if a bit infuriating. The spelling has to be exactly right. That red O on the bottom was driving me crazy. I knew I had seen it before but couldn’t pin it down. Turns out that exact logo and the company name are on the top of my office phone. About 15 inches from my nose. I only spent 20 minutes on it and, believe me, it could have been worse.

http://www.i-am-bored.com/bored_link.cfm?link_id=21542

15 comments:

Jim Hammen said...

1. I completely and totally agree. That Visa commercial is fucking stupid; in fact it is a complete and total lie. Paying cash is a good 40-45 seconds faster than a fucking credit card. That time differential is longer than that entire commercial.

2. As you seem to be posting from it, how is The Future? Can I go for a ride in your DeLorean? Do cars run on empty cans and banana peels? Does Biff Tannen control the city yet?

BeachBum said...

yeah, not sure why that happens. before it was because I had my time zone set wrong. I'm going to try and edit it to see if I can manually change it.

BeachBum said...

There, that seemed to work.

Jim Hammen said...

More fun the other way. Keep up the good work.

French said...

Bowen, La told me about the Victor thing and I think it's easily the funniest thing I've heard so far in 2007. So awesome.

Point where it could get weird: if I start calling out 'Victor' in bed. YIKES.

BeachBum said...

I've actually alternated what names she's under just in case. For example, it started as Victor, now it's under Jeff. At one point it was Donna, then some random name I made up. Part of her issue was how often texts would fly back and forth, so now I get texts from almost everyone in my cell. If I do say so, it's almost genius.

Lauren said...

Your life makes me laugh....but you knew that. And we're clear how pathetic this is, right?

BeachBum said...

It never use to be pathetic until you came into it. What's that say about you?? Huh?? Hmmm?? Huh?

French said...

GOOD LORD. Are you married to Jeff's wife from Curb Your Enthusiasm? Imagine I didn't know the history between you and Lauren as her boyfriend and I found this out. I'd be so weirded out...

Lauren said...

Maybe not pathetic...boring perhaps? Oh and...bite me.

BeachBum said...

No worries, French. Me and LaF have a mutual understanding: She doesn't throw herself at me every time we meet and I'll buy her coffee now and then. It gets awkward peeling her off me all the time. Personally, I don't know how she controls herself around me.

Lauren said...

You're delusional.

BeachBum said...

You mean I've been buying you coffee for nothing?

French said...

Dude, believe me. I'm the one who has to be comfortable with the fact that I'm her second choice. It was really weird for me when we become blog buddies, but now that I've come to grips with this whole blog triangle, I'm cool, brah.

Oh, by the way...I've had a fucking epiphany due to this whole blog scene. You'll be informed as necessary over time.

BeachBum said...

Sounds good. Although I'm leery when a jealous boyfriend gets a 'fucking epiphany' about my blog. Things could go south for me in a hurry