Friday, September 19, 2008

Overseen and Overheard

Work is going to be crazy for the next week or so. As a result I won't have much time to write, so I figured I would throw together some quick shit posts like this one. Beggars can't be choosers, I believe is the saying.

- Fantasy football update. Here are the three QBs I have on my roster: Drew Brees, Jay Cutler, Aaron Rodgers. I know!! After my bitching about Rodgers going off last week, Cutler went even MORE off. As it turns out Cutler and Brees are playing each other this week. So the question is who do I play? Cutler or Brees (more on Rodgers in a sec)?

I really can't go wrong with either, but Brees is on the road without Colston, so I'm going with Cutler at home. New Orleans secondary is horrid and he should have another 300+/2TD game.

As for Rodgers, I just dangled him in a trade in order to get Plaxico Burress. I'll let you know how that turns out. I desperately need a solid receiver to get me big numbers and the guy who currently owns him had Tom Brady. He now owns Matt Cassell, Matt Schuab and Matt Ryan. I told him that's the Matt Trifecta of Shittiness.

I tried using Rodgers to get Matt Forte, but the dude never responded to the offer. This means he didn't know how to push the 'Reject Trade' button or never checks his email. Either way, I lose.

- I just took my afternoon constitutional and while I was in the stall heard another gent arrive, go the urinal, fart LOUDLY, then proceed to tell his own asshole to 'Shut the fuck up'. And he said it angrily, too, like his own asshole just won't listen to him. Stupid asshole. Do you think he asks it advice or says good night to it? Very odd.

- Lastly, consider this for your weekend. I had to drop both boys off at school this morning which meant me taking the truck to the train station. While I was in traffic I noticed an elderly lady driving in front of me. I caught a glimpse of a book. At first I wasn't sure, but she then pulled into the next lane and I managed to get in front of her. Sure enough, she was READING WHILE DRIVING! I shit you not. In fact, I took a picture of it. Check it out!

"Damn kids and their texting while driving!!"

For the record, I was not moving while this was taken, but she was. This was her while the car was in motion. She wasn't going fast, but she was moving at least 10-15 miles an hour with other cars directly in front of her.

Consider this your Friday ‘What The Fuck?!!’.

Enjoy your weekends, folks.

Today's distraction: As a follow up to the Chalmers - Arthur post, it seems Michael Beasley was indeed involved in that same incident. He's been fined $50,000 for his part. I wonder if he was the dude flushing the toilet while locked in the bathroom.


Hammen said...

I'm glad you explained further after the picture, because my comment was going to be along the lines of "Yeah, she's reading, but you're taking pictures while driving. Which is worse?"

I bet the whole incident was Beasley's fault, and he paid Arthur and Chalmers to initially take the fall for him. Or something.

Anonymous said...

And we wonder how people can mindlessly plow their moving vehicles into a barbershop and run over four people.