Monday, January 5, 2009

Rockin' in the New Year

So many things to cover, so little time.

Since most of the slackers that took the last two weeks of 2008 off are now back in the office, time is limited for highly important things like this space. Unfortunately, this space don’t pay the bills. Hell, my real job barely pays the bills.

Therefore, let’s get to some updates and thoughts from the past week or so.

Two big events from this past weekend. Both of which will give you a glimpse of how truly pathetic my life is.

First, I made it all the way to midnight on New Year’s Eve. That’s right! I rock! Ok, not really as I went straight to bed at 12:15 or so. But I can say I watched Dick Clark slur his way through the countdown. He was a few seconds behind and nearly incomprehensible. Might be time to step aside, Dick.

Second, wifey and I actually went out to dinner with my buddy and his wife. With no kids!!! No shit! Had a blast, got semi-hammered and proceeded to out duel my buddy in Guitar Hero. I also had one of the best meals of my life when I ordered a lobster mac and cheese plate. I can’t even begin to describe how fucking good this was. As I said at the time (to the waitress, no less) ‘If sex were food it would be this’.

I then had to explain that this was an endorsement and not a come on. She was a good sport about it and completely understood. Of course she was working towards a $200 bill so she would have been understanding if I grabbed her ass.

The boys thoroughly enjoyed their Christmas (I know you were worried). Besides Guitar Hero (to which I’m completely addicted) they got Spider-Man toys, Lego sets (both of which numbered 800 pieces and above and took me a full week to get assembled) and a variety of other knick knacks I’ve been tripping over for the last two weeks.

All in all, it was a good way to wrap up the year.

On to some important matters:

- Watched the Indy – San Diego game and was beside myself over a decision made by Tony Dungy that eventually lost the game for the Colts. The situation is this:

Late fourth quarter (think there was a shade over 2 minutes left in the game), Colts are up by 3 and Manning gets sacked on the one yard line. In comes the punting unit and I say to my buddy ‘They should just hike it out of the end zone and take the safety.’

My reasoning is you don’t want the Chargers to get a field goal regardless and San Diego is going to have great field position even if the punt is good one. Why not take the safety and kick off so the Chargers are backed up at their 20? Instead, the Colts punt and it’s returned 20 yards. SD is already close to field goal range before they even run one offensive play. Why not take the safety and make the Chargers earn the winning field goal? It may not have mattered, but if it was my decision I would have taken the safety and kicked it off so there was a lot of green between the Chargers and the potentially game winning field goal attempt. This is also why I’m not coaching an NFL team.

Oh, and I noticed Tomlinson sat out another playoff game. Curious….very curious….

- Wifey was watching HGTV’s Dream House special and asked me ‘Would you move to Sonoma, California?’ Before she finished asking I responded with ‘Yeah, let’s go’.

Turns out it’s not that easy as we have to actually win the house. It’s right in the heart of wine country, will come fully furnished (including a home office with an enormous built in wine rack – of course!) and is close enough to San Francisco and Napa that I could commute to some form of a job even if that job is harassing Barry Bonds with fake tubes of ‘The Clear’ every morning.

Now my early retirement plan is to win this ‘Dream House’, sell my current ‘Crap House’, move to Cali, maybe figure out how to make wine and get into the alcohol biz (which is my true calling when we get right down to it), make millions by developing a new wine/beer hybrid that becomes all the rage then sell the company to the highest bidder.

All I need now is a catchy name, but I’ll take it one step at a time.

- A shout out to both 10 for recommending the show ‘Life’ to me and to for having the entire first season on line and available for viewing. I’ve seen episodes 1-7 from season one and admit it’s very good. My only complaint is they focus too much on the routine murder investigations and not enough on the complex and involving mystery behind the murder he was convicted of. I like that the main characters are both deeply flawed, borderline self destructive personalities. Makes them much more interesting. Once I get caught up and I find out exactly when it’s airing, it will be added to my DVR list. Of course, since this is an intelligent, quality program it will probably be canceled by then. Stupid TV people!

- Less than 3 weeks until 'Lost' premieres.

- I’m also fully invested in ESPN’s ‘Streak for the Cash’ with the small problem of my ‘streak’ having yet to get above 3 games. I will not give up, however. I will continue to fail with reckless abandon. Same goes for’s playoff fantasy contest. Turns out my fantasy picks in the playoffs are just as lousy as my regular season fantasy picks.

- Best gifts I received: a gift certificate for a kayak touring company on Plum Island (Northern Massachusetts for those out of the area). I can take my kayak up there, they’ll transport it for me and I can tour with the pros. My only issue is I have to wait until June to use it. Also received a fantastic calendar that has pictures of my boys on every month, a 'Scene It' game all about Seinfeld which I haven’t played yet, and a nice winter coat that was sorely needed (my current one has missing buttons and would be rejected by a homeless person).

- Best gifts I gave: digital picture frame for wifey and a very expensive bottle of red wine. She loved both and polished off the wine in one sitting. I love her for a reason.

- Best gifts Santa brought: Hands down it’s ‘Guitar Hero’ which the entire family has enjoyed. He also brought extra controllers for the Wii so we can match up in ‘Tiger Woods’ and fight side by side in ‘Transformers’. I like being Megatron and kicking the living shit out of Optimus Prime. His superior attitude really pisses me off.

He also brought my youngest a Lego set of the climatic scene in ‘Spider-Man 3’, complete with Venom, Spider-Man, Harry Osborn as the new Goblin on his surf board and Sandman. To say it’s his favorite movie is an understatement. He has played with it every day since he got it and shows no sign of letting up. Noticed it didn’t include the whiny and in trouble again Mary Jane. Toy maker has to know it’s audience.

- The winter warlock also hit us with two storms over the break. One which began New Year’s Eve and carried into the night. I didn’t even shovel out and didn’t get out to the cars until two days later. We just sat inside all day and drank, watched television (mini marathon of ‘Myth Busters’ was prominently involved) and played with the boys. Good times.

- Noticed Manny is being wooed by the Giants. Sometimes things are just meant to be.

That’s enough for today. I don’t do resolutions for the new year, but here are some goals I’ll be striving towards:

1: Stay in shape. Don’t want my weight going back above 200.

2: Get out of debt. Already heading in the right direction, but really want to put the pedal to the metal this year.

3: More entries here. Will probably shorten things up so consider this a quantity over quality equation. Fortunately, there hasn’t been any quality here for a long time.

4: More sex. And not just with myself this time.

5: More fun. If these means social services taking the boys away, then so be it.

6: Change jobs. It’s getting to be that time, I think. Been here long enough and further progression doesn’t seem to be in the cards. This may change if the course of the company changes, but things aren’t looking good at the moment., here I come!

Happy New Year, everyone. Let’s rock 2009 to it’s core!

Today’s distraction: A site dedicated to the fine art of T-Shirts. They even have a Sex Panther Cologne (‘60% of the time it works everytime’), a Dunder Mifflin one and, my personal favorites: ‘Meat is murder. Tasty, tasty murder’ and ‘Either your collar is messed up or you’re just a douchebag’. Getting ideas for next Christmas already. Never too early.


Anonymous said...

You're welcome for the Life recommendation. Stick with it, the second season gets much deeper into the plot involving Crews' situation. As luck would have it, setting your DVR isn't going to do shit for you yet because the second season just wrapped up. Guess you're gonna have to hit Hulu for that one too. Actually, it still might be on Glad to have you back.

BeachBum said...

That works better, actually since both '24' and 'Lost' are coming back and I may be neck deep in both of them very soon. Now I can catch up when I have time.

Hammen said...

I ended up in Guitar Hero rehab, my addiction got so out of control. There was an intervention and everything.

Don't ever be gone from Blogville for that long again.

A Tribute: deer a train and basketball said...

Life is usually on Wednesdays. I believe the second half of the second season starts up again on Feb 4th. There are 10 more episodes left this season.
Sorry I'm obsessed with this show and now it will probably get canceled.