Thursday, May 28, 2009

Five By Five

5 Band’s New Releases I Would Buy Immediately (Circa 1985)

1: Rush
2: AC/DC
3: Def Leppard (what?)
4: Pink Floyd
5: Black Sabbath

5 Band’s New Releases I Would Buy Immediately (Circa 2009)

1: Alkaline Trio
2: The Hold Steady
3: Kings of Leon
4: Elbow
5: Mastodon

5 Things I Would Tell My Younger Self If I Could Travel Back In Time

1: While it will be tough, 2004 will make it all worth it.
2: Don’t get too attached to Len Bias.
3: Stay away from Sara. She’s trouble. Fun. Sexy. Creative. Trouble.
4: Buy Microsoft.
5: *cracking open a beer* Dude, try this!!!

5 Things Our Parents Never Taught Us

1: Don’t trust rich, white guys.
2: All women are crazy. Every single one.
3: Buying a house isn’t necessarily a good thing.
4: Dogs are more work than children.
5: Find something you enjoy and find a way to make a living off it. Working simply to pay the bills blows.

5 Things I Will Teach My Boys

1: All women are crazy. If you find one you like enough to over look the insanity, that’s the one you should marry.
2: As Alan Arkin’s characters says in ‘Little Miss Sunshine’: ‘Fuck as many women as possible’. I’ll wait until they’re old enough and will encourage condom use. So I’m not totally irresponsible.
3: Make a career out of something you enjoy.
4: Stand up for yourself all of the time. Don’t have to be mean spirited about it, but never let others play you for a sucker.
5: Treat everyone with respect. Even if you have to fake it.

5 ‘L’s To Finding Happiness

1: Love
2: Laugh
3: Listen
4: Look
5: Liquor

5 Reasons ESPN Is Becoming Irrelevant

1: Brett Favre
2: Tom Brady (Look, he’s practicing. Oh, look, he’s practicing again today!)
3: Kobe, LeBron, Kobe, LeBron, Kobe, LeBron
4: Covering the BCS like it’s a real championship
5: Anything steroid related.

5 Reasons Why I’ll Still Visit ESPN Nearly Every Hour

1: Scores
2: Bill Simmons
3: Streak For The Cash
4: DJ Gallo
5: Uni Watch

5 Vacations I Want To Take

1: Grand Cayman
2: Some sort of kayaking/camping trip
3: Grand Canyon
4: Hawaii (stopping a few days in Cali thrown in)
5: Ireland

5 Current News Stories I Could Care Less About

1: The Rockefeller Trial
2: The Sotomayer Pick
3: This bullshit
4: Anything about Jon and Kate Plus Eight
5: The U.S. Torture investigation

5 Of My Favorite Pixar Movies

1: Ratatouille
2: The Incredibles
3: Monsters, Inc
4: Toy Story 2
5: Cars

5 Things That Make Me Laugh On A Consistent Basis

1: Cracked
2: The Office
3: Foster’s Home For Imaginary Friends
4: Wipeout
5: The Onion

5 Things I Want To Do This Weekend

1: Sleep
2: Drink
3: Watch movies
4: Relax
5: Drink

5 Things I Will Wind Up Doing Instead

1: Painting the kitchen
2: Mowing the lawn
3: Watching an excruciating Little League game
4: Drinking
5: Watch a movie. If I’m lucky.

Finally

5 Half Assed, Not At All Thought Out Steps To Success

1: Accept that you will have to deal with assholes in life
2: How tactfully you deal with those assholes will dictate your success
3: If you find yourself surrounded by assholes, you are one. Quit and find a new line of work.
4: Repeat steps 1 and 2 as needed while realizing there are too many assholes in life
5: Once you achieve a certain level of success you can fire all the assholes.


Today’s distraction: 5 games to play on a long road trip. Surprisingly, none of them are drinking games.

6 comments:

Clayton Bigsby said...

5 things I completely agree with you about.
1.Rush, I need to see them live.
2.Kings of Leon, listened to them for 6 hours straight on Monday.
3.ESPN, you need to include Vick. It's not news that he is under house arrest, we knew he was going to be.
4.All women are indeed crazy.
5.Cars is a great movie.

I agree with much more, but I wanted to keep your theme going.

BeachBum said...

That's right. I forgot about Vick. I turn the channel every time his face shows up behind the anchor.

thepowerof10 said...

I am also a fan of Pixar movies. I like Shark Tale, Finding Nemo, and the original Toy Story as well as the ones you mentioned.

And yes, all women are crazy.

Hammen said...

Yes! Love that you have Rush topping the list of 1985 new releases. Sometimes I get shit for liking them, but I think they're the best.

BeachBum said...

Rush may be the most under appreciated band of my life time. How a band like Creed or The Fray or countless others out sell Rush in their prime is one of life's great mysteries.

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