Monday, November 30, 2009

Week 12 Postmortem

Tonight is going to be rough. Friendships will be strained. Loyalties will be tested. Beer will be drunk. Curses will be uttered.

Allow me to set the stage:

My fantasy team includes Drew Brees and Marques Colston.

Both of them face the Patriots tonight.

I really want the Patriots to derail the Saints’ chances of going 16-0 during the regular season.

Making matters more complicated is my fantasy opponent being my best friend since first grade who has been talking shit all week.

His starting quarterback is Tom Brady.

To make things even more stressful, if I lose this week any chance at making the playoffs (and winning six hundred bucks) is gone.

I’m currently down 13 points heading into tonight’s game.

He has Brady going. I have Colston and Brees.

We will be meeting up later tonight to watch the game together. Which leaves me in a state of conflict. I want the Patriots to win, but I also want Brady to have a mediocre game while Brees and Colston combine for a touchdown or two.

Best case scenario is the Patriots go up big so the Saints have to throw and throw and throw some more. Meanwhile the Pats are content to run the ball to burn the clock in the second half.


The Patriots don’t pass much at all and win by running the ball all game. Brady only throws for 180 yards and a TD.

Adding to my dilemma will be watching this game in public. We’re meeting at a bar called ‘Skybox’. I am certain that if Brees goes off for seven touchdowns (three to Colston) I will be straining not to cheer and talk smack to my friend in front of an all Pats crowd.

This could get ugly. Maybe I should just stay home.

In a related note, my streak of having an opposing player go off against my fantasy team is now up to six weeks and running. Sunday’s player? Jamaal Charles. 140 something yards and a touchdown. Friggin’ 22 points he put up against me. 22 points!! From Jamaal Charles! Really?

Let’s get to some games. Hope everyone enjoyed their Thanksgiving. I have yet to feel the sensation of hunger since Thursday morning.

- While I’ve been marveling at the progression of Vince Young the last few weeks, nothing could have prepared me for yesterday’s 99 yard, cool as a cucumber, game winning drive against the Cardinals. Young played everything perfectly. He didn’t panic when the Titans faced two fourth downs, he threw it away when he needed to, he avoided sacks, ran when he needed to run, passed when he needed to pass, and his mobility created that last second touchdown pass.

More importantly, his team seemed to follow his lead and maintain their composure when they needed it most. I don’t know if it was Young or one of the offensive linemen, but on the last play of the game you could hear someone yelling ‘Don’t hold! Don’t hold!’ while Young scrambled away from the pressure.

Since Jeff Fisher took a lot of heat for the 0-6 start, he should get just as much praise for keeping this team together and believing in themselves. What’s happening with the Titans is amazing and entertaining as hell. I, for one, hope they keep it up.

- While the Titans are forging a bond stronger than Krazy Glue, there is something strange going on in Pittsburgh where several players – including Hines Ward and Santonio Holmes – openly questioned the motivations behind Ben Roethlisberger not playing against the Ravens. Holmes, in particular, wondered whether Big Ben could live with that decision following the tough loss. There seems to be a fracturing going on in the clubhouse of the defending champs. Something Pittsburgh is not familiar with at all. Let’s see how Tomlin handles this.

- If Seattle beats St Louis 27-17 and nobody cares, did it really happen?

- Watched three plays where Michael Vick came in as QB for the Eagles. He ran twice for a grand total of 4 yards and passed once (incomplete). This begs the question: Can Vick even play any longer? Or does he just need more time to get in shape? Or was he never very good to begin with?

- If nothing else, the firing of Dick Jauron has helped Terrell Owens’ career. In two games without Jauron Owens has 293 receiving yards and 2 touchdowns.

- Fine! After watching the Vikings destroy the Bears (who look worse every week), I will begrudgingly believe they are for real. But I’m not happy about it! Not one bit.

- Here’s what I don’t get. The Texans have one of the most dominant wide receivers in the league in Andre Johnson. They have a decent – maybe very good – quarterback. They get up 17-0 on their undefeated divisional rivals. They then go into meltdown and trail 28-20 in the fourth quarter. Now, I’m no offensive genius, but you’d think they would find a way to get it into the hands of their most explosive player during one of the more crucial moments of their season. I would ask you to guess how many times the Texans threw to Johnson during the final 12 minutes of the game, but you probably already knew it was a wide and round numeral.

- Atlanta’s season just gets more depressing every week. Michael Turner is already nursing an ankle injury and now they’ve lost Matt Ryan with some bizarre toe injury. Not looking good and I believe it all started when I predicted the Falcons would be one of the NFC wild card teams. Sorry, guys.

- Something to consider: With yesterday’s 17-6 win over the Browns, the Bengals will go undefeated in their own division (Steelers, Ravens, Browns). Every other team that has accomplished that feat has played in the Super Bowl.

- With five games left I have yet to figure out the 49ers or the Dolphins. They look great, they look terrible, they look mediocre. The Texans, I’ve decided, are a very talented team in need of a good coach. I think Mike Shanahan would be a very good fit in Houston. Just saying. He’s available and Houston is more attractive than Buffalo.

- For the record, the Pats – Saints game tonight has very little ramification for either team. After tonight there’s a good chance both teams could win out the rest of the way. The Patriots last five games are Dolphins, Panthers, Bills, Jaguars, Texans. The Saints have Redskins, Falcons, Cowboys, Bucs, and Panthers.

Holy Shit Stat of the Week #1: In his first eight weeks with the Chargers, Chris Chambers had 9 catches for 120 yards and 1 touchdown. In four weeks with the Chiefs, Chambers has 17 catches for 319 yards and 2 touchdowns.

Holy Shit Stat of the Week #2: Washington scored more than 20 points for just the second time all season.

Holy Shit Stat of the Week #3: The Colts have clichéd their division and there are still five games left to play.

Random Monday Night Prediction: The Saints and Patriots score 30+ points each and I wind up losing my fantasy game when Tom Brady RUNS in a touchdown. Pats win 37-31.

Today’s distraction: Matrix done with Legos. And, yes, it’s as awesome as it sounds. Turn down your volume if at work.


Anonymous said...

The Colts clichéd their division? As in they've overused their division to the point that it is now devoid of its original meaning?

Due to the Colts' dominance, I'm not sure if that was a typo or a very interesting turn of phrase.

BeachBum said...

I'm not clever enough for that turn of phrase. So chalk it up to a typo. A typo of pure GENIUS!

michael gilchrist said...

Drew Brees has been outstanding this year and aside from Brett Favre is the MVP of the league this year. I think the Saints are one of the best 4 or 5 teams in the NFL, but I think the Pats, Colts, and Vikings are all superior teams. If you let any qb especially Brees sit back in the pocket without pressure hes going to pick the defense apart.

Anonymous said...

Told you the Vikings were for real, although after watching the Saints last night, there could possibly be one hell of a NFC Championship game if they play each other. I'm going to go out on a limb here and say that this year the Super Bowl champion will be from the NFC. In fantasy, I was down 48 points going into the Monday night game. My opponent had no one left to play, and I had Brady, Brees, Moss, and the Saints Defense. Pretty sure I only needed Brees to win this past week.