Leave it to ‘Lost’ to answer questions we’ve had for five years only to raise an entirely new set of perplexing situations.
Oh, right. Let’s not get ahead of ourselves. Cut me some slack, it’s been nearly a year since I’ve done this. I’m going to switch things up today since there’s no way in hell I’ll be able to run down everything that happened. I’ll skim over the highlights then get to the questions and my new theory (which, like my last one, will be totally off base).
Read no further if you haven’t seen the two hour premiere last night.
That should really be the main question after the entire bomb thing. We see Juliet (I’ve been spelling her name wrong this entire time!) banging on the bomb then get transferred to Jack flying on Oceanic 815. There is some turbulence like last time (will it crash this time?) he speaks to Rose, and…..
Oceanic 815 doesn’t crash. Jack did it! Yay, Jack! Way to blow yourself back to reality and no chance with Kate. You idiot!
Or did he?
Cut to Kate hanging off the most overt sexual symbol in television history (or maybe that’s just me), her ears ringing, still in the jungle, still on the island, but – judging by the exploded Swan Station – back in the present. She runs into PAD, Jack and Sawyer who gives Jack the kick in the stomach we all wanted to give him last season. Better late than never. Jin, Hurley and a still dying Sayid are close by, as well.
So what’s going on? Did it work or not? Thoughts on that below, but for now let’s just break it down based on Real World and Lost World.
Real World: Jack flies merrily along, bumping into Rose and Bernard, Desmond, saving Charlie (great to see him again!) from choking to death on a bag of heroin, getting close enough to Kate so she could steal his pen. Sayid helps Jack save Charlie by kicking in the bathroom door, and he gives polite nod to Locke – still wheelchair bound. Sawyer and Hurley and even Arnst (non exploded version) have a merry interaction.
Scan to below the ocean just after the flight experiences some turbulence and there is the Lost island; submerged, shark infested (sans Dharma logo), and sad looking. Although the foot is still there, if a bit waterlogged. So I guess the bomb not only blew Jack back to 2004, but sank the island and made Jacob hold his breath a really long time.
But not all is all rosy as Oceanic Airlines lost Christian’s body and Locke’s knife set (both integral to the island’s mythology), Kate escapes (with Sawyer’s help no less) by hijacking the cab being taken by Claire. Everyone is together again!!
Quick note here: I found it interesting how everyone seamlessly fell into their old relationships even though they barely knew each other. Jack and Locke having a spiritual conversation which ends with Jack offering to help Locke walk again, Kate and Sawyer teaming up to escape a tight situation, Sawyer playing big brother to Hurley, Sayid becoming Jack’s muscle, Locke mentoring Boone about survival tactics. It was off putting to see Sun and Jin back in their old, stuffy relationship, however.
Lost World: After Jack and Sawyer exchange pleasantries, Kate hears Juliette calling from the bottom of the station. She’s alive!! Which, considering she detonated an atom bomb four inches from her face after falling 200 feet is pretty impressive. Alas, it doesn’t last and she dies just after Sawyer reaches her. Typical woman.
Supposedly she has something very important to say to Sawyer (sorry, not used to James, yet) but doesn’t get it out in time. PAD later discovers it to be ‘It worked’, which makes no sense at all since they’re all still on the island and she’s still dead. Sawyer blames Jack for all of this, by the way. Even vows to kill him.
Sayid is still in rough shape and even Magic Man Jack can’t help him. Hurley has an idea planted by the recently deceased (‘Sorry, dude’) Jacob – bring Sayid to The Temple. Brilliant! Only they have to drag him down a hole, over the river, through the woods, wind up getting kidnapped by Crouching Tiger and his sidekick, Harry Potter, who wind up accidentally drowning Sayid in a polluted fountain of healing. If this is who Jacob entrusted with running his Temple, it’s no wonder he’s dead.
Hurley fills in Hong Kong Fooey (my Sawyer nickname suggestion for the leader of The Temple) about Jacob being dead and he institutes a lock down and sets off fireworks that are apparently loud enough to wake the dead. No, really. It wakes up Sayid who sluggishly asks ‘What happened?’
Back at the foot, Jacob is indeed dead. His body guards come charging in way too late and get their heads handed to them by the smoke monster, who, it turns out is actually Locke, who is actually Fake Locke. It’s complicated.
Fake Locke is playing Ben for a sap, something Ben isn’t too comfortable with. Anyone else find the irony in Ben whining ‘You used me!’ when he’s done nothing but manipulate and use everyone he comes in contact with for decades? Fake Locke confronts Richard with ‘Nice to see you out of your chains’ before knocking him senseless. He also tells all the other people ‘I’m very disappointed in all of you’, but not really sure what that means. Disappointed in that they stood around and did nothing? Or disappointed that they’re all getting paid to hang out on a beach in Hawaii?
Captain Frank and Sun are still standing around in confusion. More things change…
What We Learned
- Locke is not Locke, but Smokey in Locke form. We’re assuming he’s also the man in black, but that has yet to be verified.
- Richard was once in chains which could mean he and Fake Locke were S&M lovers or Richard was someone’s slave. Frankly, that’s a toss up.
- The children and missing survivors are all hanging out in The Temple. Wonder if they have a Wii?
- Don’t make Fake Locke angry. You wouldn’t like Fake Locke when he’s angry.
- Charlie needs a refresher on how to do drugs. You take it out of the bag, man!
- The English language has a funny taste.
- Juliet managed to set off the bomb.
- Sun looks sexier with longer hair.
- Sawyer needs a hug and doesn’t want to be called ‘boss’ any longer.
- Nobody cleans up the dead bodies Smokey kills. Must be fun playing hide and seek on that island.
- An ankh was in the guitar case Hurley was carrying around. Also, LAX security should be sanctioned since nobody ever opened the stupid thing.
- Kate’s strong enough to kick out a bathroom stall door and knock out a highly trained U.S. Marshall while handcuffed. Wait…really?
- The actors playing Sun and Frank may have the easiest gigs ever. Stand on a Hawaiian beach and look stupid. Here’s a few hundred thousand for your troubles.
- Jin has this time travel thing down. Headache? Check. Ringing ears? Check. Day turned into night in a second? Check. He should write a guide.
- The Temple needs to upgrade their pool cleaning service.
- Drowning a gunshot victim isn’t the best medicinal practice. Wait, maybe it is.
- Jacob’s body guards are terrible. I blame Ilana for slowing them down by making them carry Locke’s actual dead body.
- Juliet setting off the bomb has somehow triggered a different reality for the Oceanic flight people. Desmond no longer crashes on the island nor spends years of his life punching in numbers. The Dharma Initiative is extinct. Presumably Libby is roaming around Los Angeles looking for work and Ana Lucia is off beating some suspect with a phone book. Hey, maybe Ekko is still around, as well!
- For supposedly peace loving hippies, The Temple folks sure seem trigger happy. How many other people have they killed that just happened to wander into The Temple?
- Sayid is immortal! And badass! He’s a badass immortal!
Man, where do we start?
- Are we now witnessing two realities? Parallel universes, so to speak? One where Oceanic 815 doesn’t crash and one where it does?
- Or (NEW THEORY) are we going to witness ‘Course Correction’ on a grand scale? Bear with me for a minute here. Juliet sets off the bomb, sinks the island and Jack, Kate, et al on 815 make it to L.A. without a hitch (other than a missing body). But this is happening in 2004. Perhaps we’re going to see how fate gets them to return to the island on the Ajira flight in 2007.
This makes sense with Juliet (or her corpse, to be specific) telling PAD that ‘it worked’. That Oceanic didn’t crash, but they still wind up on the island anyway. This doesn’t really jibe with the island being a sunken wreck, but I’m sort of winging it here. Perhaps the island resurfaces somehow?
It also jibes with the flight attendant and now Temple vixen saying ‘They were on the first flight with me’ as opposed to saying ‘They crashed with 815’. Considering how many people were put on the island during the 815 crash, you would think if that had still happened she would have said ‘They were part of 815’ and that would have explained it all.
I’m just asking the questions, people. For the record, this is my most half assed theory, yet. It’s my first quarter assed theory.
- With the island sinking does this mean Jacob, Richard, Ben, The Others, are all drowned and dead? Or just living in an underwater wonderland!
- Is Sayid really Sayid? Or is he Jacob coming back to put his Fake Sayid boot in Fake Locke’s ass? Has some other spirit taken over his body? Maybe it’s Patch looking for a comeback!
- Who are The Temple people? Are they an extension of The Others or are they separate? Think they celebrate the Fourth of July with those homemade fireworks?
- Anyone remember what the watch signified? The one Jin was carrying with him?
- Also, was all that cash actually Jin’s or was that what Sun was going to use to start her new life?
- What are the ashes people surround themselves with to protect themselves from Smokey?
- Even better, do you think there are two smoke monsters? We witnessed Ben releasing it from the sewer last season, but it really doesn’t seem like he has any control over it at all. Anyone else hear that same mechanical sound when it was approaching last night?
- While we’re here, did the people on the beach not see Smokey enter and exit the foot when it kicked ass? It certainly looked like it came in from outside and left the same way.
- What is Ilana’s story? She related to Jacob somehow? How did she know where to go?
- Are Ana Lucia and Ekko on the Real World 815, as well?
- Did Real World Locke really get to go on a walk about in his wheel chair (a roll about?) or is he blowing smoke up Boone’s…well…you know.
- Now that Charlie gets to L.A. will DriveShaft make a comeback?
- Is Jack experiencing some sort of displacement when 815 didn’t crash on the island? Did anyone else notice a look of disappointment when the plane made it to the gate in L.A.? Sawyer especially seemed dismayed that something special didn’t occur.
- Have other events been changed by the bomb? Hurley saying ‘I’m the luckiest man in the world’, Boone being unable to talk his sister out of her damaging relationship with her boyfriend, Arnst not blowing into tiny bits, Sun and Jin perhaps not staying together, Rose dying of cancer.
Has everything changed?
- Why didn’t Jacob fight back?
- Where were Michael and Walt on 815? Did he not have to take guardianship of Walt since the island is submerged?
- Does this mean that Juliet is still alive? Since the island never recruited her can we assume she’s still a doctor somewhere?
- What was the significance of wiping the knife on the piece of cloth? Anyone else notice it was Locke’s knife that was used to kill Jacob? That same knife that goes missing from 815 in the Real World.
- Was there any hidden meaning in Jack’s claim to Locke in the Real World that ‘Nothing is irreversible’?
- Who is Fake Locke? And why is everyone so terrified that he’s walking around?
- Also, if all Fake Locke wants to do is go home, then let him go home. What’s the big deal?
- And where is his home?
I’m sure we’ll find out soon enough. We better!!
Until next week.
Today's distraction: It's The Fuselage, a Lost centric site developed by the actual show's creators. I'm guessing that makes it a bit more 'in the know'.