Monday, April 5, 2010

Bright Days

Random thoughts from a glorious Boston weekend.

- Perfection isn’t a word I throw around lightly, but the weather this past weekend was just that. Sunny in the mid 70s, air crisp and refreshing, I even got my first sunburn. Not to worry, just slight coloring that made me feel more human and less of a hibernating zombie. Nice to be back.

- The Red Sox and Yankees spent the entire offseason gearing their teams towards pitching and defense. Last night’s score: 9 – 7. The more things change…etc, etc….

- While the last few innings were exciting, the first half of last night’s game (and the MLB season opener, in case you missed that part) was excruciating. The fourth inning wasn’t even over and it was after 10pm. Needless to say I watched the highlights on SportsCenter this morning. Tell me again why a 7pm start is so unworkable?

- Friday night the Celtics blew another game in typical ‘go away from what’s working just fine’ fashion and they almost did the same Sunday, nearly blowing a 22 point lead against the Cavaliers. Once the victory was secure, the Celtics (Tony Allen, Garnett, Pierce in particular) started talking trash to LeBron James. That’s great guys, get the best player in the league pissed off at your entire team just before the playoffs start. Fucking brilliant. If the Cavs and Celtics meet in the playoffs I guarantee LeBron averages a triple double in a one man display of destruction.

- Where’s Shaq, by the way? I know he hurt his thumb, but shouldn’t he be back by now? Or is he now so huge he can’t fit through the loading dock doors?

- Speaking of injuries, did anyone else see that awful Andrew Bogut injury? Man alive, another on my list of highlights to never see, though will never unsee, again.

- Questions and answers from the drive to my brother’s house in East BumFuck, New Hampshire. The main road to his place is still closed from the flooding the last few weeks so we had to take an alternate route.

Q: Why do people live out here?
A: Desperation

Q: Does this road ever end?
A: Yes. Just seems like it goes on forever.

Q: Is that a cow?
A: Several, actually.

Q: How do people around here ‘run out’ for groceries? It’s a 20 minute drive to anywhere!
A: Yeah, but every other house has a cow where you can get fresh milk. Eggs, too, I’d bet.

Q: Ready to go home?
A: Hell, yeah!

- Please tell me I’m not the only one who doesn’t care that the iPad debuted today? What’s the appeal of this stupid thing, anyway?

- With yet another round of child abuse accusations emerging from Europe and directly incriminating the current Pope (he’s accused of ignoring the problem and transferring the abusers parish to parish), I can’t help thinking the Catholic Church is teetering on the edge of collapsing. Anyone care to help me give it a push in that direction?

- My brother lives in Portland, ME where they just had a topless march through the center of town. A march, I should point out, that consisted mostly of women. Since it wasn’t illegal for women to take their tops off in public in Maine, what was the point?

According to organizer Ty MacDowell, the point was topless women shouldn’t attract any more attention than men walking around shirtless. This was said – I imagine with a straight face – while men all along the march were taking pictures of the protesters with their camera phones. Nope, nothing to see here. Move along.

Oh, just found a video link for this lunacy! Enjoy. Sadly, can’t find many hotties in this and there are men wearing dresses for some reason.

- The Red Sox just extended Josh Beckett for four years and 68 million dollars. This after he gave up 5 runs in 4 innings. Maybe dollar signs were impairing his vision last night.

- The DOW is heading towards 11,000, work is picking up everywhere (including my stupid job), and the economy in general is heading in the right direction. So when, exactly, are companies going to start hiring again? My theory: They’re squeezing workers for as much work as they can get out of them for as little compensation as possible. Why hire and pay another salary when the remaining employees are working two jobs for single pay?

- Baseball season for my son started last week. Have another practice today in more beautiful weather. Forgive the abbreviated entry. I have other things to get to today. They involve outdoors and women with tops. Considering the women, this is a very good thing.

Today’s distraction: One of the greatest Lego contraptions ever built. I’m lucky if I can build a truck following the pre-packaged instruction. Screw this guy!


thepowerof10 said...

"Yeah, but every other house has a cow where you can get fresh milk. Eggs, too, I’d bet."

New Hampshire has cows that can lay eggs?!?! Maybe that answers your first question; Why do people live out here? Miracle cows!

BeachBum said...

Miracle cows!! Now that's a farm I would visit.

No, that's not true. I'm betting a cow laying eggs would wear thin after 5 minutes.